Everybody Can’t Go

Hey 👋🏾. Hope all is well in your world. We are now at the point of snagging that extra hour of sunlight and spring is pretty much here. Today is the first day of spring and the world around us is already waking up. We have navigated past the darker and colder season; however, for some strange reason places in the south like Louisiana are currently in the middle of a chill. I guess winter is taking its time moving on out this year. So to anyone that is also in an area that varies in temperature drastically from day to day, sending a little love and mini tip to go ahead and wear layers. The reasoning for that slight tip is to let you know that you should go ahead and wear an outfit that allows you to take off components, because going to 80 degrees by midday from 50 degrees in the morning is quite the adventure. Soon, most people are going to be complaining about the constant heat in those same areas. Changes are expected and yet sometimes still so surprising. Change and time progression are actually a few certainties that tend to not be topics of too many debates, but today both are points in the topic. I just want to remind you that, everybody can’t go as you change.

  The idea of having the same friends and family around you throughout life is a thought that most people have. It’s because we want to keep the familiar things close, and if those things also bring joy then it only makes sense to plan for longevity. Now I don’t know your background, but my churchgoing grandmother would always tell me, “Tell God your plans and watch him laugh.” I took that to mean that although we take the time to plan how we want life to go once we feel we have the reigns, everything is still so uncertain and anything can happen. Prepare, but be flexible. Living with those words in mind have definitely help soothe a few spoiled plans. Does not stop me from planning things out and having more checklists than {clever comparison} . At every stage of life we tend to have certain family members and friends we couldn’t fathom being without or on a different level of communication. Life certainly has a way of shifting and so will your social circle. It’s not always a negative thing. Now we tend to hold on for dear life to a few people, but sadly we find that most times things don’t work unless both people are trying to stay connected. I must restate that having a change up does not necessarily mean negative feelings are involved. At times we feel guilty about the natural progression of things. For example, friends that have lived on the same street for over a decade and head on to different colleges would have to work a little harder to keep a connection. Through progression we get change, and we either rework what’s around us to work for us or we stand a chance to loose it. No need to feel guilty about major shifts because most times we ourselves are shifting same as the things around us, and we must simply adjust. We must understand that there are no hard feelings in the statement that everybody can’t go.

As you advance professionally, spiritually, and emotionally you won’t be the same, the same things will not excite you, and your responses to issues may not be the same. Why would they? You are actively working for better and to be better. The people around you may not be running the race at your pace, and that’s fine. You are not in the same lane. You may have to disconnect from some important people to get where you are going in life. This is a harsh truth that most personally successful individuals have a problem with. There has to be a balance in regards to self and others. Over extending can cause you issues, while regressing to focus on self can also bring about some negative connotations. That’s why you have to find the healthiest way to be okay when it comes to sharing yourself with your surroundings and the people in it. During the process of finding balance, that can take years, it is  usually when your village is formed.

Here are some ways to be okay with outgrowing people:

• Acknowledge that growth and change are natural and inevitable parts of life.

• Reflect on your own values and priorities, and ensure that your relationships align with them.

• Communicate openly and honestly with those around you about your growth and how it may impact your relationship.

• Focus on building new relationships that support and nurture your growth.

You are learning how to handle people as they learn how to handle you as you grow. The ones that understand the situation kind of fit into your space as you fit into theirs. On the other side of that, the boundaries set up by you may not be appreciated by someone that is used to a “norm” and you may loose a loved one. It’s always a give and take when dealing with other people and you simply never know how one will respond to change. The best way to move is in consideration of others while preserving your peace. The you now, and the person you are striving to be. People come and go, some we expect and others we don’t. Through all of any saddening feelings you may experience, I want you to choose you and remember that “Everybody can’t go” and thats okay because your journey is uniquely for you and yours.